WOR JACK
Father was a quiet inoffensive man not given to loudness or brashness, perhaps rather shy. He was about 5 ft 8 ins in height, perhaps less than average for that era. A stocky body and square shoulders taking after his mother, but not heavily built. Slightly long arms, he was not muscular in build, the tops of his arms and ankles were slim considering his stocky frame. Small neat feet, like his father, he may have been a good dancer had he taken it up seriously. As a young man, he was a sprinter over the 100 yards and went around the sports meetings taking part in the handicaps where side betting played a big part. His brother Tommy acted as his manager.
He had a good head of hair right through his life and when young, disliked how it curled and stuck-up when he washed it and would tie a towel around his head to keep it flat. Blue eyes, a broadish nose and a well defined mouth when young. Perhaps a gentle face with an earnest boyish look about it.
In the house he always wore a belt around his hips and often a cardigan or a 'gansy' as he called it. Carefully shaved in a mirror above the fire or next to the window most evenings prior to going for a drink across the road to Hebburn Newtown Working Mens Club.
With Reyrolles factory being only a few minutes walk from the door and the Club opposite, it did not require much effort to get to work and play. On a Sunday evening, he liked to dress in his best and looked very smart in grey suit and trilby.
Left school at 14 and eventually found work as a merchant seaman going across to France. He said he always took a day to get his sea-legs and stopped feeling sick. It is said that he had a young lady friend in France but never revealed any of his past romance to any of us.
Presumably, after a few years at sea he and a friend established a business at Pelaw Main. This was a service for organising the mooring of incoming and outgoing vessels. He was classed as a foyboatman and earned good money at the time. During the 1930's and the depression, the reduction of shipping in the Tyne saw an end to the business and work was hard to find. He managed to get a job in the Reyrolles factory which he disliked but with a wife and five children to support, times were hard and it brought in a working wage. The war started and he tried to get into the Merchant Navy by giving a wrong age but did not succeed.
During most of the war years, Mother and children were evacuated to the country ( Evenwood near Bishop Aukland ) and he fended for himself at home ( 106 Tennant St Hebburn ). Jacqui, then a teenager, was sent to Hebburn sometimes as a home-help. This must have been a lonely period but he did manage to visit us at Evenwood on occasion.
I recall when he left by train, we would stand at the top of a field overlooking a broad valley and see the train passing in the distance. From a carriage window he would wave a white handkerchief which we could just make out from afar.
He remained a factory worker for the rest of his working life and made no attempt to improve his position but accepted the plod of dull routine work. It was not easy to get out of the rut as the thirties depression, the War and the post-war scarcities with money always short as the family grew-up, limited any improvement. Work was hard with long hours including Saturday morning. There was little time or energy to think of changing course and it was a period when most people took a job and stuck with it for their working life.
Quite a hard worker in his unassuming way, he kept an allotment for most of his life and supplemented the table with a variety of home grown vegetables practically all the year round. I always helped in the garden from an early age and in many ways, my Father was a good friend to me, although never expressed his inner thoughts.
Although I can't recall any details, he was a good support in early days at the Grammar school as often I was reduced to silent tears by the misery of so much disciplined learning but took solace by thinking of him as always there to help.
Although he never learned any skills or craft he was a good practical worker. Rather 'heavy handed' and strong arms he was quite able at any manual work. He built a good strong garden cabin for the allotment, first checking the bolted frame assembly in the backyard before taking it to the garden.
He recognised and enjoyed home life with his family and often joined in games and activities. He had a good sense of humour and enjoyed songs and light music of the time. Favourite was 'Beautiful Dreamer'. I was overwhelmed with emotion when Noreen Nicod, who played the organ at his funeral, gave a magnificent rendering of it as the cortege left the church.
He was very easy going about who stayed at the house although made no attempt with the housework and cooking. As both Mother and Father were from large families, they were used to lots of people around the house and most mealtimes had many around the table.
Father's family were from a closely knit small community and there was always a warm-hearted friendliness about them.
Very careful with money although he always made sure he had enough for tobacco, going for a drink and betting. Certainly not generous with his family where money was concerned and limited housekeeping money to a fixed minimum sum, regardless of what he earned. This led to many rows and arguments as my Mother, who was very generous, struggled against terrific odds to feed and clothe and support us with really, what was a pittance.
A quiet natured person, rather reserved and very Victorian in attitude. He preferred to make do and mend rather than renew although this reflected to some extent the challenge of the times.
With little academic learning and simple but friendly upbringing, he was quiet and introspective and did not find it easy to express himself, very rarely pushed his thoughts or opinions. This could lead to him being ignored which at times annoyed him. He felt slighted when at my wedding reception he was not invited to speak, although had he made any sign to give voice, I would have been more than pleased.
Another occasion in later life, he had gone to Newtown Club with Charles Nicod after Auntie Nan's funeral and was with him at the bar when Benny Nicod entered. Apparently, unknown to my Father, Benny invited Charlie back to his house and they both left without my Father being aware. Such was the deep resentment to this rudeness, my Father from then, never spoke to Charlie again for the rest of his life.
There were long periods at home, when my Mother and Father never spoke to each other after some upset. These silences once went on for nearly two years. To the children at home, the relief when they came to an end was more than welcome.
He did not encourage further education by staying on at school after 16 and was against his daughters getting higher education, especially if fees were required. I suppose having left school at fourteen and not understanding the academic scene, he saw the world of work as the way forward and the sooner one got into it the better. In fact he did not appear to have the foresight and understand the freedom and opportunity that education could bring.
Now, in later life, I see his attitude as rather selfish and over money, there were many scenes and awful memories where a little more generosity would have made life easier for all. He was always able to enjoy the three 'b's in his life - beer, bets and baccy. He was very close with money and in all my life, I can't recall him actually giving me a copper to spend.
No doubt there was a lot of frustration at the way events restricted his life. He wanted to get a car in the thirties but failed to pass his driving test. He reckoned to have a minor bump during the test which seemed to have deterred him from further efforts.
However, looking back, I remember home life as being very secure with lots of undemonstrative love, feelings and humour. I see him now, quietly sitting in the armchair, wreathed in tobacco smoke from his pipe, listening and watching and enjoying his family just being around.
Further snippets come to mind:
All the family going to Gateshead swimming baths when I was only about seven.
My Father taking a swim in the sea when we were all at the beach. He had an unusual rather elegant over-arm swimming action.
A fair came to the open area at the back of the house and he took us along and dissipated some money at different stalls. I recall feeling quite worried that about ten shillings had been spent. There was an occasion when we all went to the 'Town Moor' when it had its annual fair.
When very young, he once took me to see Sunderland FC play at Roker Park.
Having had a business he was inclined to the Right of politics and along with Mother always supported the Conservatives. Also, was a non-practising freemason although he never ever talked about it.
Got on quite well with some of the Nicod brothers and as a young couple, went about as a foursome with Charles and Nora Nicod.
His way of home education was to help my reading skills by getting me to read out the football scores and always had the wall-clock slow to by about 40 minutes to ensure one had to do some mental arithmetic for the time.(Terry)
PARSIE
Affectionately known as Parsie by all the family for many years, Fathers' character was made up of all the things that would not have been acceptable for a macho Geordie image. A quiet, gentle and rather shy person who I never in all of my life knew to be physically aggressive to any of his family.
He loved us all as children and had a nick- name for each of us, my own being Snitch or Snatch taken from characters in the 'Beano' which I was privileged to have once a week (although I seem to remember more than me reading it). I have many happy memories of him playing board games with me, dominoes, at which he excelled, draughts and even tiddly-winks.
He loved Christmas, especially the decorations and also made much of 'Dooky Apple Night', joining in the fun of plunging his face in the dish of water to try and bite the apples and hanging them from a string across the room, where with hands tied behind our backs we once again had to try to bite the apples. For many years I always received a hand made sledge for Christmas.
Father and Mother used to make a regular trip to Newcastle on a Saturday morning (there was a lot of carrying on in their absence and I was much teased and always crying when they arrived back) My dad had usually been to the 'school furnishing shop' on Grainger St. and bought lots of pencils and rubbers and writing books, but never enough to go around the five of us. This was quite deliberate so that there would be a lot of squabbling which pleased his rather mischievous sense of humour.
For many years he went to the dog racing on a Saturday evening. I awaited his return with much excitement for if there had been a win, he would take off his cap which was filled with, what seemed to a child's eye, lots of pound and ten-shilling notes and bars of chocolate. I loved these Saturday evenings when I was allowed to stay up late but now realise that my poor Mother was left alone with us whilst he went out.
During my time at Jarrow Central School he always attended speech night to listen to the headmaster (Mr Younson) speaking. I mention this only as I don't think he ever went to the school for anyone else. He always left before the entertainment by the pupils so that he was in time for his 9.00 pm drink at the club.
He secretly yearned to be a tap dancer and made a few attempts on New Year's Eve when he was less inhibited! When I was about thirteen, he took me to see the film 'An American in Paris' at the Gem cinema. He loved the dancing of Gene Kelly who starred in the film.
Sunday evening was always a walk with him up the country road but not before checking my nose-holes and ears. (I don't know why they weren't called nostrils.). I don't remember any conversation between us on these occasions. My shoes were always mended by him and studs put in the toes and heels to make them last longer.
Described as a 'very peaceable man' by my mother, he spent many happy hours at his allotment , often just sitting looking at his garden, not doing anything in particular, alone with his thoughts. One time when Ann Phillips came to the garden with me she came-over faint and he gave her a drink of water out of some vile cup he found in his cabin. I never knew where the water came from, but she recovered very quickly! The produce from his allotment always seemed excellent and he regularly won first prize for his pickle cabbages at the club leek show. This annual event was exciting for us all, with my mother brushing the red cabbage with what I think was a sugar solution to make them shine. Amongst the various other flowers he grew, his favourite were Sweet Peas.
He had many eccentricities which were extremely irritating. Deciding to climb the ladder to the roof when Mothers back was turned was a regular occurrence or cleaning the chimney and covering everything in soot and leaving all the doors open for a 'good blow through' in an already freezing house. He was quite obsessed about checking and re-checking that all the switches in the house were turned off if he was going out.
He seemed quite a fit man well into old age in spite of never being without a pipe in his mouth. He was still riding his bike to and from the allotment when he was eighty years old, with his favourite (dirty) little scarf tied around his neck. His deafness, always a source of amusement to us when he was younger, was no longer funny in old age and seemed to isolate him even more.
In the last months of his life, when he became ill I went to stay with him for a short while but stayed four weeks. That time brought a closeness between us that I would never have thought possible.
To this day, the image stays with me of when the ambulance took him to hospital and I had to return to Cambridge. As they drove away he raised his stick to me with what turned out to be his last sad farewell gesture.
My abiding memory of him is sitting quietly in his usual chair beside the fire, enveloped in pipe smoke, with a heap of burnt paper and matches in the hearth, gazing out of the window with eyes that never lost their marvellous blue, even in old age.(Rosemary)
Memories of Father - Jacqui
Christened John William, he was always known as Jack, the youngest of a family of six. Reticent in speech, Victorian in views, he managed to sway Mother's affections from the man she was courting ( Walter Hall ).
He was happily married until after the 1939 - 45 war. During most of this time he lived alone as all his family were evacuated to the country at Evenwood. He worked hard in the local factory alternate weeks of day and night-shift plus compulsory overtime. He was refused entry into the Merchant Navy because his work was classed as essential war-work in the factory. The stress of work, darkness, loneliness and responsibility probably changed him and he became self-indulgent and almost estranged from his family.
He earned reasonable money before the depression of the early thirties and on marriage bought a house in Buchannan Street, Hebburn and had it beautifully furnished and carpeted. The clannishness of family was such that when the need arose for a bigger house (spurred on by Mother) he did not buy one with a garden which would have necessitated moving further away but moved round the corner to 106 Tennant Street.
His early married life was good. There was always fine brandy from the ships, large salmon from the river, plenty of good food and an ever open door for hospitality. He bought a very good quality piano but was frustrated at his inability to play. His lack of confidence probably made him aware of is own inadequacies. Mother's family were always held up as being intelligent, artistic and musical whilst Father's were 'working class'.
Post-war stresses and scarcities saw Mother become more strident and domineering. He retaliated by restricting her to 6 per week housekeeping out of a wage of up to 20. He saved a little money during this time (100) but when the antagonism between him and Mother persisted, she forged his signature and withdrew it.
He was intelligent and wise in some respects but lacked higher education. He served no apprenticeship and was not trained for any specific career. He loved the sea and enjoyed adventure books about the sea. He also liked love stories. He read newspaper articles thoroughly and always had a reasoned opinion about things in general but found it difficult to express them.
Although not a player, he enjoyed football and followed Sunderland FC for many years and always wanted to go to the Wembley F.A. cup final mainly for the atmosphere. He had very strong Conservative views and was extremely patriotic. Loathed trade unions which he likened to Frankenstein and was suspicious of many people in authority. He saw through what was often shallowness and deceit but lacked the vocal ability to fight them.
He liked parlour games and taught me to play cribbage and once won the 'News of the World' crossword. He enjoyed Whist and dominoes and taught me to ride a bike and swim. He was very patient, neat in many ways, particularly when eating. Liked simple food but not dinner on Monday if the meat was left-over from Sunday. Favourite meal was fried bacon, boiled cabbage and potatoes with the bacon fat poured over. He disliked change and modern household equipment. (Jacqui)
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